The word authenticity is a weird word. It’s something we want or need but to achieve it, it’s difficult. A simple concept: the quality of being genuine, but what does that mean? I mean, how can you be consistent in a fluid concept? What does that even mean??
We’re human, we evolve everyday, we come across problems and we solve them(or don’t) and then we move to the next day. Even those who live in a routine life have changes everyday. SO how does one stay free from pretense..or hypocrisy?
By staying present. I know we have heard that word before, what does being present have to do with anything? Have you ever had a young person in your life that maybe you are not around very much? When you see them again, wow! They are so different! How did that happen? Has it been that long?!! What have I been doing??
This happens all the time. So staying present means we are aware everyday that situations are different, like a new flavor of ice cream that is similar to the one you had previously. Present means we are paying attention to every conversation, feeling we have, task and environment. I know, that sounds exhausting. The thing is, it really isn’t; what is exhausting is trying to catch up all the time because we are not paying attention on a daily basis.
For me, being authentic is all about honesty and action. Where in your life are you unhappy? Where is stuff funky and not working? Where is the junk dragging you down? Take out some paper and write down what isn’t working, then in another column write out what is bothering you about it.
This is a way to be honest, so now you have your answers, what are you going to do about it?
Some actions may be easy to plan, not happy with your weight? A new walking routine is easy to understand, got it! What if something is harder like being lonely? It’s a more difficult concept but you can start by getting out of the house! What if we put both of these together? Loosing weight and loneliness might be helped by taking a Zumba class. I know what you are thinking…but I won’t know anyone..that’s the point!! You won’t at first but you will eventually!
A small thing about being authentic, because we change so often we have to check ourselves often. Checking in can be easy, allow yourself to be objective and release emotional ickyness. I’m not saying emotions are not important, they absolutely are!!! Emotions can cloud our judgement and actions because we feeeeeeeeeeeeel sooooooooooo so we deeeeply about how much we loooooooooove our partners. What I’m saying here is that kind of feeeeeeeeelings can make us miss the point of questioning if the relationship is really working and good for you. Another example, if you hate your job and want to think about other options, you may get stuck in the hating for 20 minutes instead of having a concise moment of “this job isn’t good for me, what else can I do to make a living?”
Staying present and being authentic are skills, they require practice. I suggest a weekly check-in on a day you tend to be in a good mood such as Friday or Saturday, it doesn’t have to take long a good 20-30 minutes will suffice. As time goes on, you check-in more often … add goals or what you are grateful for or how successful is something. Checking in can be a wonderful tool to get to know your true self and the best part of being present means we are dealing with molehills instead of mountains!!!
Gandhi said”Be the change you wish to see in the world.”
So, honestly, what is or isn’t working? What are you gonna do about it?
Buckets of Love to you!
I found a great many things when I started being present with myself, such as a trip to the Zoo can help you with any ailment of the heart. Dancing poorly is the best, not only are you moving but you are hopefully laughing at yourself. Choosing to have fun in any moment will make you shine and your days better(who doesn’t laugh at their boss?). Singing catchy songs can make you happy and irritate others. I make every day better by saying in the morning “Today is the day I make millions!” Cartoons are good medicine. Exercise is funny, it makes you do all sorts of weird body poses that aren’t ready for on a regular basis. Wear goofy underwear. Tell others what you are passionate about. Look people in the eye and tell them you are grateful for them and better yet, look yourself in the eye in the mirror and do the same. Rescue a shelter animal. Love your funky ridiculous self, it’s the meaning of life. Eat lots of ice cream…this will save your soul.